Reveries III

Soon this will feel like a distant dream. Until then, may you rest in a deep and dreamless slumber. - Elise, Westworld

സ്നേഹതുമ്പി - Snehathumbi, from the movie December

This super cheesy song was my anthem when it came to my first big crush. I suppose it was the imagery of two people who know each other as kids growing up to fall in love that did the trick. I really was obsessed with this song for quite a while.

The funny thing is, so was Sibnonymous. I don't know who he was crushing on at the time, but we really bonded over the whole thing. Whenever one of us began to sing it, the other would join in. Occasionally we would forget what the song sounded like, and would have to try and remind each other.

At the age of 6, all of us began to go for Catechism classes for the first time. Every year, all the batches would put on a show, and our batch was assigned the story of Jairus' daughter. For the uninitiated, Jairus' daughter died of an illness, and Jesus turned up as everyone was mourning and told them she was only sleeping, and then 'woke' her up - i.e. he raised her from the dead. I was part of the dance at the end, wherein Jairus' daughter celebrates her resurrection along with what I suppose were her handmaids. Why all the handmaids were wearing Barbie pink frocks is beyond me.

I was also an extra in the middle of the play, part of the crowd of mourners who begin to laugh at Jesus. And that Jesus was the most adorable guy I had ever seen. His light coloured eyes and impish smile stood out as I observed him from a corner of the room. I was silent, never spoke to any of the other kids. Instead, I merely marvelled at their ability to be friends with each other with such amazing ease.

A few weeks into rehearsal, cute-guy-Jesus disappeared and was replaced by a stocky, pompous, bespectacled version. I must say I harboured some very undeserved dislike for Jesus 2.0 - he'd no right to replace the first one, considering he wasn't half as good looking.

Jesus 1.0 eventually turned up again shortly before we were due to perform the show. He had been demoted to the crowd of mourners now, and I took care to be seated as close to him as possible without actually being noticed.

I had completely forgotten all about this until my friend J, a tall, light eyed boy with an impish smile, started to tell me the story of how he had almost been Jesus in a catechism play once. I was now 11 or 12, and deeply in crush with J, our newest family friend. I was astounded to make the connection - even more astounded to realize I'd independently crushed on the same guy twice.

പൂങ്കാറ്റെ പോയി ചൊല്ലാമോ - Poonkatte Poyi Chollamo

As we grew older, and the (mutual) crush grew stronger, I also took to humming the above song. Till date I have no idea where I heard it - I don't even know what movie it's from, let alone have watched it. I liked this song mostly because I'd misheard the lyrics as "my lover that has blue eyes" rather than "my lover that has mischievous eyes."

It's strange to think of the kinds of songs that have played soundtrack at various times in life. Even stranger to think that they remain favourites even though the original reasons for liking them have long since become irrelevant.

In a way I wish Michael WAS a sheik, and I was his virgin secretary or princess bride. I know it’s not very feminist of me to think that. But if he whisked me off to his tent in the desert instead of moving to Japan, at least I’d know he really cared.

- Mia Thermopolis, Princess on the Brink