Moderating the Abyss

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'Tis that time of the year again, when I must begin to look at houses, consider exams, and a whole lotta other stressful things. It's in times like these that I grind my teeth in frustration at the memes we millennials make to try and get through life. All those digs at boomers and whoever. It feels hopeless that this is all we can do.

Or maybe that's just the allergies talking.

To me, it feels like a good day to be depressed. (When is it not?) But that being said, I don't want to be depressed today, and it's one of those days where I can decide whether or not to be. Welcome to the bluh of moderate depression.

The thing about moderate depression is that it actually feels lighter to those of us who struggle with severe depression on a regular basis. You actually feel "happy," even though you have no hope, no faith, no strength to do anything except the bare minimum and then lay in bed. Relativistic bullshit at its best.

In addition to all of that, these days I'm so tired that I actually leave my house so as to find some place peaceful to sleep in (such as my friends' places). This way I don't have to worry about accidentally sleeping on a kitten, or being used as a pincushion, or being woken every half an hour by plaintive complaints. 

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