Jessica Jones and the Pointlessness of Talking to Boys

I adore Jessica Jones. The show and the character. In my opinion, it is hands down the best show in the entire Defenders universe.

My TV tastes aren't usually shared by those in my immediate social circle - I have only to mention The Vampire Diaries, for instance, for the eye rolling to start. This is partly because the women I'm friends with have no great interest in the fantasy/ sci-fi genres, and the friends I have that like fantasy/ sci-fi all seem to be men.

As a result, men who like sci-fi now are, to me, the most infuriating species of all time. They will happily tick off their favourite shows - Supernatural (no women characters, except for when Jody Mills turns up) and Stranger Things (aka this one girl is so much powerful than everything else so the ration of roughly 2:1 ratio is totes cool) are common faves. It's supremely rare to find a guy that has even heard of Once Upon A Time, let alone one who counts it among his faves. TVD and Teen Wolf are scoffed at as being girly fare - despite the male leads running everything. And Supergirl might as well be the Invisible Girl, for all the discussion she receives when Arrowverse comes up. 

It was OUAT that had me a little off balance in this case. A show which is unarguably filled with strong, brilliant female characters... (and Rumple). Someone who was a fan of OUAT surely couldn't be subject to the same biases.

Boy, was I wrong.

Because even when guys deign to follow women-centric shows, they watch these shows for that lone male character who keeps up with the rest of the cast. Like Rumplestiltskin from OUAT, or Kilgrave from Jessica Jones.

"Oh, Jessica Jones wasn't that great," says he. "But David Tennant was awesome. And the character of Jessica Jones herself is also great. But the rest..."

Blasphemous, to me. But I try to explain all the same. I try to point out that the entire first season - I've yet to watch the second - was about the trauma of rape and recovery, about PTSD, about the bravery of friendship...

"Oh, but I don't relate to that. Because I've never experienced any such thing."

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THAT'S THE POINT, YA NUMBSCULLS. E.M.P.A.T.H.Y. You have never had to experience this bullshit, so here it is, delivered to you on a platter so you can bloody understand. And this lot turns up their noses and says, ooh, so unrelateable.

Because 101 movies about bloody Vin Diesel driving a bloody car is 💯% relateable.

Because a Dark One angsting about his wife's desertion (due to his angsting) and then angsting over his Dark One-ness is relateable.

Because Wentworth Miller and Dominic Purcell escaping from prison 5 times is super fucking relateable.

People still watch this stuff, don't they? Women have sat through decades of male leads doing fuck all and still kept going back to watch more of the same. Black folks and POC continue to watch movies and shows that barely acknowledge their existence (Jessica Jones included). Shut your fucking privilege and listen to what a bloody show is telling you.

Here's the thing, dudes. When I speak to you about a show like JJ or GOT, when I specifically mention things like rape, sexual assault, PTSD, recovery, or the fact that those fuckbores over at GOT HQ invented a whole storyline just to depict an underage (at the time of their meeting her) actress being raped... that's a fucking test. And if you react with anything less than complete horror and immediate rejection of said show/ movie, you can consider yourself out of the running immediately. Even if you might not know it yet.

If you've ever thought that you have the luxury of dismissing rape culture with, "Oh, artistic liberty," then you're in for a nasty surprise. Because that tells me all I care to know about you. So, keep that line moving. Next.